New PDF release: Carpe Jugulum (Discworld, Book 23)

By Terry Pratchett

it truly is infrequent and luxurious occasion whilst an writer is increased from the underground into the overseas literary institution. with regards to England's best-known and best-loved glossy satirist, that occasion has been lengthy past due.

Terry Pratchett's profoundly irreverent Discworld novels satirize and have a good time each point of lifestyles, sleek and old, sacred and profane. constant number-one bestsellers in England, they've got garnered him a safe place within the pantheon of humor besides Mark Twain, Douglas Adams, Matt Groening, and Jonathan rapid.

having said that special an writer as A. S. Byatt has sung his praises, calling Pratchett's difficult and pleasant fictional Discworld "more complex and fulfilling than Oz."

His newest satiric triumph, Carpe Jugulum, consists of an particular royal snafu that results in comedian mayhem. In a healthy of enlightenment democracy and ebullient goodwill, King Verence invitations Uberwald's undead, the Magpyrs, into Lancre to have a good time the start of his daughter. yet as soon as ensconced in the fortress, those wine-drinking, garlic-eating, sun-loving smooth vampires haven't any goal of leaving. Ever.

basically an uneasy alliance among a fearful younger priest and the argumentative neighborhood witches can shop the rustic from being taken over through individuals with a cultivated bloodlust and undesirable flavor in silk waistcoats. For them, there's just one strategy to struggle.

opt for the throat, or because the vampyres themselves say...Carpe Jugulum

Show description

Read or Download Carpe Jugulum (Discworld, Book 23) PDF

Best humor books

David J. Rosen's I Just Want My Pants Back: A Novel PDF

Jason Strider is a twentysomething younger guy within the urban, with an English measure from an Ivy League college, a really small condominium within the West Village, a vapid task as a receptionist at a casting agency—and no specific notion what to do together with his lifestyles. On so much evenings, Jason will get stoned and is going out, occasionally together with his party-hearty college buddy Tina and infrequently on my own within the immemorial male quest to get laid or, if now not, get hammered sufficient to truly remorse it day after today and be overdue for paintings.

Justin Halpern's Sh*t My Dad Says PDF

After being dumped by way of his longtime female friend, twenty-eight-year-old Justin Halpern discovered himself residing at domestic together with his seventy-three-year-old dad. Sam Halpern, who's "like Socrates, yet angrier, and with worse hair," hasn't ever minced phrases, and while Justin moved again domestic, he started to list all of the ridiculous issues his dad acknowledged to him:

"That girl used to be attractive. . . . from your league? Son, enable girls work out why they won't screw you. Don't do it for them. "

"Do humans your age understand how to brush their hair? It feels like squirrels crawled on their heads and commenced fucking. "

"The worst factor you'll be is a liar. . . . ok, positive, definite, the worst factor you will be is a Nazi, yet then quantity is liar. Nazi one, liar . "

greater than 1000000 humans now persist with Mr. Halpern's philosophical musings on Twitter, and during this booklet, his son weaves a brilliantly humorous, touching coming-of-age memoir round the better of his costs. An all-American tale that unfolds at the Little League box, in Denny's, in the course of excruciating relations highway journeys, and, most often, within the Halperns' kitchen over bowls of Grape-Nuts, Sh*t My Dad Says is a chaotic, hilarious, real portrait of a father-son courting from a big new comedian voice.

<hr noshade="noshade" size="1" class="bucketDivider"/>

Download e-book for kindle: Expecting Someone Taller by Tom Holt

All Malcolm Fisher did used to be run over a badger. regrettably the badger became out to be Ingolf, final of the giants. together with his demise breath he reluctantly gave Malcolm presents of strength and made him ruler of the realm.

New PDF release: The Darwin Awards: Evolution in Action (Darwin Awards, Book

"Only issues are infinite-the universe and human stupidity, and I'm now not so yes in regards to the universe. " -Albert Einstein

Named in honor of Charles Darwin, the daddy of evolution, The Darwin Awards vividly portrays the best examples of evolution in motion, and exhibits us simply how unusual good judgment may be.

surprise on the thief who steals electric wires with out shutting off the present. Gape on the lawnchair jockey who floats to a top of 16,000 toes suspended through helium balloons. research from the fellow who friends right into a fuel can utilizing a cigarette lighter. All 3 -- and lots of extra -- contend for Darwin Awards while their offerings culminate in remarkable misadventures.

those stories of trial and awe-inspiring error--verified by means of the writer and counseled through site readers--illustrate the continued saga of survival of the fittest in all its selective glory.

Extra info for Carpe Jugulum (Discworld, Book 23)

Example text

But it was big. Two more of the creatures came up, towing a boxlike affair mounted on large wheels. The driver, sitting high above, pulled the thing to a stop when Rasco whistled to him. “Get in,” Fatso ordered, swinging open a door in the vehicle’s side. I held back, pointed with distaste. “It’s filthy in there! Can’t the League Navy provide decent transportation…” Rasco kicked me in the back of the leg so I fell forward. ” They climbed in after me. “It is Navy policy to use native transport when possible, to aid the local economy.

Scorn dripped from my voice. ” He did not answer but tapped away at the terminal again. The fax buzzed and produced three sheets of paper. Three color portraits. I dropped two of them onto the floor and handed the third back. Bibs. He hashed some more keys, then slumped back and rubbed his chin as he studied the screen. “It fits, it fits,” he muttered. “Marianney Giuffrida, age twenty-five, occupation given as electrotechnician with deepspace experience. Arrested on a drugs possession charge, anonymous tip, swears she was framed.

He did not like prisons, he had told me that. Although he was a firm believer in law and order he did not believe I should be incarcerated on my home planet, Bit 0’ Heaven, for all of the troubles that I had caused there. Neither, for that matter, did 1. Since he knew I had the lockpick I should have bided my time. Waited to make my escape during the transfer out of this place. During the transfer. It had never been my intention of doing anything but serve my time here in this heavily guarded and technologically protected prison in the middle of the League building in the center of the League base on this planet called Steren-Gwandra—about which I knew absolutely nothing other than its name.

Download PDF sample

Rated 4.94 of 5 – based on 38 votes